This is a weekly series I’m writing in 2016 to focus on one of my three words for the year: beauty. Each Monday a post will explore some new aspect of beauty.

Yesterday my family celebrated Grandma’s 86th birthday. In typical Grandma Bea style, she showed up the party in high heels, black ‘slacks’ (pants), a black blouse and a zebra print jacket. Her hair was recently dyed red and tousled on her head. Her makeup was carefully applied and her lips with shaded red. As I sat playing cards, and actually beating her at Euchre, I couldn’t help but think there is a beauty in aging.

When we are young, obviously, there is beauty there too. But youth also comes with a number of restrictions and drawbacks. The young often worry about what others think. They worry about how they are perceived, if they are saying and/or doing the right thing. The young worry about the future, obsess about what’s to come, desire to be older. All of which is a great growing and beautiful process. But aging and especially old age bring with it so many beautiful components.

You stop caring what others think - about you, about your life, about your style, about your beliefs, about everything really. I think a lot of that comes with a growing confidence and conviction in who you are and what you want/need in life. I’ve only just breached the 30-barrier and I already feel such a difference in this than I did just 5 or 10 short years ago. And watching my students, I see that is probably the number one concern… what do others think of them. Many of them often act tough and talk as if they don’t care, but they do. When you are older, you begin to care less and less if you aren’t going to fit in with a specific group, or if your convictions go against the social norm.

You start living for what really matters - love, family, faith, etc… When we’re young, perhaps because we care so much about the opinions of others, we are often easily convinced to live for things that don’t matter or are unimportant in the grand scheme of things. Being wasted every weekend, obsessing over a boy who doesn’t know we exist, getting lost in the vortex of celebrity gossip, etc.. We spend hours and hours of our every week on the things that are ultimately meaningless, partly to fit in and partly to figure out who we are. It’s an exploratory phase and that’s awesome. But what a relief as we age to not have to live in the midst of these things. To live for what really matters most - to stay focused and authentic to who we are and where we’re headed.

You value your family. I think we all value family during the various stages of our lives, but as we age and hit the elder years, time spent with family takes on an even more important role. We want to spend time with the people we love, we want to be involved in their lives. We want to be there for the goods and the bads. But we also realize the importance of having them there as well. When we are young we often take for granted that the parents will be there, or the sibling will always be near to annoy us. We don’t always look forward to family moments and time spent together. But aging brings into focus the very sobering reality that life is short, and for some it is really short. Yesterday, my grandmother thanked me for coming and taking time out of my busy weekend to make it to her party; that is meant so much to her. No 16 year old has ever told me how grateful they were that I made it to the shindig, heck no 30 year old has ever been that sincere about it.

Your experiences give you power. My Grandmother grew up in rural Illinois on a poor farm, where she played with bricks for dolls because they didn’t have enough money for real dolls. She’s held a dozen or more jobs, including a high school disciplinarian, a secretary, and a thrift store sales associate. She was one of the first to buy stock in the original company that became AT&T. She raised three children, saw the invention of the computer and rise of the internet, and all sorts of other amazing things in 86 years. All that life experience gives her knowledge, gives her a unique opportunity to offer advice and encouragement. She’s personally experienced joys and sorrows, hopes and despairs, triumphs and failures. And that’s power. She’s lived the human experience and can pass on her knowledge to those of us who haven’t seen all that life can throw at you.

I feel like there are so many more things to say on this topic, perhaps it needs to be explored in another blog post or two, but for now… What do you think? Is there a beauty in aging?