This is part of a weekly series I’m writing in 2016 to focus on one of my three words for the year: beauty. Each Monday a post will explore some aspect of beauty that I’ve been considering. Read more about my focus words of the year.

Based on the amazing comments and conversation on my recent post, entitled When Body Positive is Really Body Negative, I thought I’d take advantage of this week’s Beauty-themed Monday post to share the ways I work on being more body positive. (Or perhaps the better way to word it, as suggested by one of my readers last week, self positive, rather than body positive.) Why body positive and beauty? Well, I think there is some serious beauty in loving yourself, your body and your mind.

8 Ways to Become More Body Positive

Stop stepping on the scale! The number on the scale is such a silly figure for determining anything about ourselves. I don’t think I fully learned that lesson until I ran my first marathon. I started running to get fit, to lose weight, to love my body more. By the time I ran my first marathon I had dropped several sizes, but the number of the scale hadn’t fluctuated too much. At first I remember being devastated. How was it possible that I had dropped roughly 4 clothing sizes but hadn’t managed to lose more than 10 pounds? Well, it’s called muscle. And guess what - it weighs more than fat. So, while the number on that silly little scale barely changed, my body and my health had changed dramatically.

Quit looking at sizing tags. As every woman can attest to, clothing sizes vary from store to store and from piece to piece. Ultimately the little tiny number or letter written on a tag that’s hidden within your clothing doesn’t matter at all. I’ve stopped looking at the tag to determine sizing and have gotten really good at eye-balling an item. I hold it up and consider what will fit me. What will flatter me. What will I feel comfortable in.

Buy clothes that flatter. This goes along with the above, and I’ll admit it is one of my biggest pet peeves. When I worked retail I would bring a client a size that would flatter her, based on the cut and material of the clothing. Sometimes it would be a larger size than she usually wore or wanted to wear - which lead to one of two things happening. Either she refused to try it on or she would only try it on in the arbitrary size she is determined to be in her head. What’s the point of fitting into a smaller size if it looks like you are squished into the item? And who the heck is going to see that little number on the tag? Cut it out if it bothers you so much, but wear what flatters you, not a specific size. My closet literally has smalls to extra larges in it, and I couldn’t care less.

Know your measurements and shop accordingly. One of the things I think most important to dressing well and in a style that flatters, is to know your personal measurements. Pull out a tape measure and figure out your inseam, your waist, your bust, your hips, your shoulders, your thighs. All of that information will help in determining what to buy. It will also tell you your body shape, which helps in purchasing clothes that play up your best

Hold off on the comparisons. Each woman is made differently. We have different proportions, different body shapes, different metabolism. We’re all uniquely different. It’s not a comparison. It’s not a contest. So why do we spend all this time looking at others and deciding internally if we measure up? Shouldn’t we spend more time thinking about ourselves and how we measure up to who we want to be?

Mute the inner Negative Nancy. Sometimes we are our own worst critic. The way we talk to ourselves is often far from what we would ever utter to a good friend, or even a so-called enemy. But somehow we think when those words are directed at ourselves its okay. Cut that out. Talk kindly to yourself. This doesn’t mean we sugar coat life, but acknowledge, accept and move on. So instead of getting down on ourselves for the pizza and brownie lunch… acknowledge that probably wasn’t the best choice to make for you, accept the fact that you made that choice, and move on hopefully stronger to avoid the temptation in the future.

Treat your self right. Okay, yes this is such a big one that it could be a dozen points all on its own. But when we really love something we take care of it. We nurture it and protect it. For instance, in September I bought a new car. I’ve taken that baby to the car wash more times in the last four months than I ever took my old used car in all the years I owned it. Why? Because I want it to stay as good as new for as long as possible. Shouldn’t we treat our body the same? Give it the sleep it needs to rejuvenate every day. Give it the food that is best for its full flourishing. Consume the water and vitamins needed to have it function properly. Hit the gym. I also find the more I take care of my body the more I love it, probably too because my body and therefore my mind are healthy it’s easier to love.

Rejoice in your triumphs. I think we don’t often give ourselves enough credit for the good things, the triumphs, the strengths. Find and rejoice in the things your do well. Give yourself credit where credit is due.

Those are my suggested 8 ways to become more body positive. What do you suggest? Share your thoughts in the comments below.